It has been a strange few days. Actually, make that a strange two weeks. You know what? For good measure, let’s just say life has been strange since I last wrote regularly on Tic Tock last September. There has been so much, period. I don’t know what words to put after “much” because, well, there has just been a lot. So we will have to live with a boring, plain “period.”
One of the muchness that has been happening is good doctoring. I have been receiving medications that work for me and Botox injections for pesky muscles (looking at you, shoulders) from the neurologists at Rush University in Chicago. I have been participating in Neurofeedback, which I was skeptical about at first but has lowered my anxiety levels by an impressive amount. I have started EMDR, which is a therapy for PTSD. It reminds me a lot of those pimple-popping videos (I know you know what I’m talking about). Like someone has this awful thing that has been sitting there on their face for who knows how long, and they try not to touch it but every single time they look in a mirror or touch their face or rest on a pillow–it’s there. And then there are these videos of them when are fed up with these terrible things and they pop them. The horrible part is, when they pop the pimple, worse stuff comes out. But then after a few days, their skin is better and they can sleep again without wanting to scream. EMDR is kind of like that… but for your brain. Kind of. (Maybe do your own research on this one and don’t bring up this analogy to your doctor if you are interested in pursuing EMDR. In all honesty it is one of the best things I have done for myself and it is completely non-invasive. Here’s a link.)
I have also been working on practicing self-care. For me, this means bath bombs, trips to parks, taking photos, and working in my patio “garden.” I listen to a lot of podcasts and audio books as well (as an aside, there is a great new one called The Tourette’s Podcast. I am not affiliated with it; I just want to let you all know it is out there). I have been meeting other Touretters and talking to them about the impacts of societal stigmatization on the disability community. In general, I feel like I have been growing branches into the inter-sectional points of my passions and ambitions. And yes, I am still in graduate school (but every day closer to finishing!).
I have been trying to bee more open and authentic, both with myself and other Touretters/parents of Touretters. If I have a desire to be advocate, that means I can’t hold things back, especially from myself. I have really tried to get into that mind-space lately. In that spirit, I made a “Share Your Story” video to submit to the Tourette Association of America, which is uploading to YouTube now. I do not know if they will like it, or even respond to it. But in the video, I tried to be as honest as I could about my story, and about my mantra of always moving forward on a positive trajectory.
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